


Shut up, Tucker

by metalkicker



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Drinking, First Time Blow Jobs, Friends to Lovers, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-17
Updated: 2019-11-17
Packaged: 2021-02-08 03:02:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21469003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/metalkicker/pseuds/metalkicker
Summary: Grif and Simmons wake up naked together in the same bed. Tucker deduces what happened last night.
Relationships: Dexter Grif/Dick Simmons
Comments: 3
Kudos: 97





	Shut up, Tucker

**Author's Note:**

> This is an art trade with my dearest Kathy! Hope you love it!

Grif does not remember the last time he was this hungover. His head aches something fierce, and his mouth tastes like a cat pissed in it while he was asleep, and something is making a terrible whining noise. It sounds like… well, if he had to be honest, it sounds like when he was back in basic and Simmons was having a nightmare about his mom.

Wait, it is just Simmons.

_ Wait. _

Cracking an eye open, Grif finally looks around. The room is light, and it smells clean. Shifting, he finally looks over at the source of the noise. Yep, that’s a very naked, very freckled, very asleep Simmons. What the _fuck_ happened last night?

“Simmons..” his voice is hoarse as fuck, “Simmons!” 

Reaching over, he smacks a hand over the freckled nose in front of him.

“Huh!” Simmons sits up immediately, just like he used to when they were in basic, “‘m up, sir!”

“Shut the fuck up, it’s just me. What happened last night?”

Simmons blue eyes meet his, and the ginger flushes as red as his hair.

“Grif, what the fuck are you doing in my bed?! And why are you naked?? Why am I naked?!” Simmons is practically hyperventilating at this point. 

“Well, I figure I’m naked because I always sleep naked. And I’m in your bed because I’m super hungover which means I was super drunk. Obviously.” Grif reaches up and rubs the base of Simmons neck where his regulation haircut is starting to get a little long. “Relax, I’m sure nothing stupid happened last night.”

“I’m--” Simmons suddenly pales and gets up, and Grif doesn’t even bother looking as he hears those feet rush to the attached bathroom and Simmons violently throwing up in the toilet. 

Yep, that’s exactly what he was expecting to happen. 

The rest of the morning is subdued, Simmons finally pulls himself away from the toilet long enough to get dressed and to convince Grif to get out of bed with the thought of donuts and coffee in the mess hall. Grif can’t hold in a groan when he realises the rest of their stupid crew is at their normal table.

“Oh shit, there they are!” Tucker is trying not to snicker as the pair sits down, but the smirk on his face is frustrating to say the very least, “how’d last night go, lovebirds?”

Grif doesn’t bother with a response, Tucker doesn’t deserve it, but he can feel Simmons getting worked up next to him. 

“Lovebirds? What’s that supposed to mean?” Simmons isn’t even focusing on his coffee at this point, fingers fidgeting with a sugar packet.

Tucker’s smirk somehow widens and he shoots a look at Washington, who’s looking a little amused himself. Why the fuck did they get roped into drinking last night?

“What Tucker means, is, well, we’re wondering how your night went?” Is Washington’s ever so carefully chosen question. Great.

“Your guess is as good as ours, dude.” Grif says around half a donut, headache already starting to clear up with the introduction of sugar into his belly, “I don’t remember a goddamn thing about what happened last night. I just woke up at Simmons’ house this morning.”

“Don’t tell me, you two were naked in the same bed, right?!” Tucker bangs against the table a bit with his hands, overly excited, and Simmons’ face fucking confirms it. “You totally did! See Wash, I told you they only needed a little push and they’d be banging before we knew it!”

“W-W-We did NOT bang!” Simmons voice cracks just a tad, and yep, there’s the blushing. “We must have just fallen asleep!”

“Buck ass naked? Dude, I doubt it!” Grif probably has never hated Tucker more than this exact moment. “You two totally banged, and fucked so amazingly you don’t even remember.”

“I like that you know exactly what happened, Tucker, were you there watching or something?” Grif finally says after finishing the other half of his donut, reaching for the another one.

“Gross, why the hell would I watch you two?” Tucker rolls his eyes, then gives Wash a sly smirk, “I’d watch Wash fuck Carolina, but- yeowch!”

Judging by Tucker’s reaction, Wash has just kicked him under the table.

“For the hundreth time, I’m not going to fuck Carolina!” Wash is red up to his ears, he always gets this way when his love life is brought up, “she’s like a weird older-sister-slash-boss-but-not-really person to me.”

“Anyways, “ Tucker turns his attention back to Grif and Simmons, “ I know exactly how you two hooked up last night, it was something like--”

\---

Grif is practically carrying Simmons up the steps to the redhead's house, one of Simmons’ arms draped around Grif’s shoulders. This is ridiculous, he should just fucking leave Simmons out on the front portch to sleep. That way, he’d get all of Simmons’ super comfy bed to himself and wouldn’t have to worry that one of them might have a nightmare and piss the bed or something. Whatever. 

Unlocking the door with the spare Simmons gave him ages ago, Grif gets them both inside. His coordination isn’t enough to get both their shoes off, and he knows that Simmons will bitch tomorrow morning, but he just heads up to the bedroom as the exhaustion starts to kick in. 

“Grif, my shoooessss..” Simmons slurs, okay, so he’s still conscious, cool, “the carpet…”

“Shut the fuck up, just have the Roomba clean up the mess..” hopefully Simmons can’t hear Grif panting as they get up to the top of the stairs. “Dorks like you have Roombas right?”

Simmons just groans, and it sounds something like, ‘fuck you’ but Grif still gets them to the bedroom. He does shove Simmons down on the bed though, grateful to not have to hold them both up for the first time in half an hour. 

“Fuck dude, you’re heavy as fuck for being a twig.” Grif kneels down in front of Simmons to take his shoes off, sighing. It really felt like basic training, taking care of Simmons like this. “Socks off?”

Instead of an answer, Simmons just brings a leg up to rest on Grif’s shoulder, pulling him in a bit closer. Closer, as Grif realises, to the tent in his pants. Ok. Weird.

“Grif, drinking makes me so hornyyy…” Simmons whines, bringing a hand down to card through the other’s longer hair. “I can’t help it.”

“Simmons, I am NOT giving you a blowjob. You’re drunk, I’m drunk, we probably won’t even remember this tomorrow morning.” Grif can feel his face heating up, and he wouldn’t necessarily say he’s the type of person to get flustered, but he’s getting flustered now. 

He can’t say he’s never thought of fucking Simmons, because he totally has. When you’re two dudes stuck together in a box canyon on your first real military deployment, your mind starts to wander. Simmons is thin, and even though he’s covered in freckles, his skin is really soft looking. So Grif has totally watched the red head shower and got off to it later, whatever, who cares. Now is not the moment to bang him, it should be after some stupid candle lit dinner.

“Grif, now is the perfect time to do it.” Simmons is whining again, sitting up to look at Grif eye to eye, “we won’t remember, so we might as well do it. Please?”

Fuck, he can’t argue against that logic. 

And it’s almost like a spell is broken, the moment Grif leans up to kiss Simmons. It’s messy, and hot, and God, it’s exactly what Grif needed. He brings one hand up to rub at the base of Simmons neck, and fuuuck, Simmons just moans at the touch.

“Here, here..” Grif manages to get them both on the bed, settling in between Simmons’ legs, before finally turning his attention to the hardness in their pants. He’s drunk and can hardly get his fingers working properly but the moan he gets from Simmons once he’s got a hand around his cock is heaven. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, “ Simmons is hardly coherant at this point, but his eyes snap open the second Grif holds his hips down with one hand, the other one still stroking him slowly. “Grif, if you stop I’m going to fucking kill you!”

“Slow down, I was gonna blow you but if you’re going to be a dick, I can sleep downstairs on the couch.” He fixes the redhead with a smirk before sinking down to lick a stripe up his cock. 

It’s weird, and not exactly what he pictured giving a dude a blowie like, but Simmons moans again when Grif finally takes the tip of his cock into his mouth, and that’s all the motivation he needs. He treats Simmons like the most delicious thing he’s ever sucked on, licking and humming around his length, until the redhead is trembling beneath him. It’s fucking AWESOME. 

“Grif, Grif, Grif--!!” Simmons is practically screaming his name at this point, back taught against the sheets before he finally cums down his throat, “_Grif_!”

\--

“Tucker, shut the fuck up!!!” Grif is red up to his ears as Tucker moans his name in the sluttiest way possible. “Please_ for the love of God_, stop!” 

“What? Man, I didn’t even get to the boning yet!” Tucker is pouting, but he still looks incredibly smug, “unless you don’t think Simmons can make it 2 rounds? I can revise the story.”

Simmons doesn't even bother finishing his donut as he stands up and briskly walks away. Great.

“You’re so fucked later, Tucker.” Grif snags the donut Simmons left behind before following him out. “Simmons, don’t take it to heart, it’s okay. Tucker is just being a dickhead. Like always.”

“Shut up, Grif, I’m not in the mood. My head hurts even worse and now I feel all weird and conflicted.” He is pretty red, and almost looks genuinely upset. Fuck.

“What is there to be conflicted about. We didn’t bang last night, Tucker is just pulling it out of his ass.” Bringing a hand to rub at the base of Simmons’ neck, Grif shoves the rest of the donut into his mouth, just talking with his mouth full. “You almost seem like you wish it happened or something.”

“ I do.” The redhead fixes him with a look that leaves him a bit stunned, and hell, he’ll admit it, a little turned on, “ I do wish it happened. I’ve wished it would have happened for years, Grif. I’m mad about you.”

Oh.

_ Oh, fuck. _

“I mean, I can’t say a blowjob from me will be any good, but we can head back to your place and try, Sims.” Grif is trying to will the blush from his cheeks, pulling Simmons in a bit closer, “I’m crazy about you, too, so lets just fucking get this over with.” 


End file.
